The Def Guide to Zzap!64

iain wrote:and bananas!

Don't get me started.

g.

Well we'd better enjoy them while we can, it seems they won't be around for much longer!

iain wrote:Well we'd better enjoy them while we can, it seems they won't be around for much longer!

OK, then, GET me started. What's happening with bananas? Are they contracting some kind of virulent fungus which is about to wipe our yellow friends from the face of the earth, or are you talking about your own personal supply which you plan to have for breakfast?

g.

Well, all bananas have the same dna. ie all the bananas in the world come from the one big parent banana. So... if a banana disease comes about, it'll kill off every banana. Ordinarily there'd be a few munant plants or different strains of them, which would survive a disease, but the banana would be fucked Makes you wonder about GM stuff doesn't it...

iain wrote:Well, all bananas have the same dna. ie all the bananas in the world come from the one big parent banana. So... if a banana disease comes about, it'll kill off every banana. Ordinarily there'd be a few munant plants or different strains of them, which would survive a disease, but the banana would be fucked Makes you wonder about GM stuff doesn't it...

That is just bizarre. A world without bananas... What would people slip on when they're casually walking down the street? How could we make banana-related desserts? Kumquat split just doesn't sound the same... *sigh*

As for the GM stuff, don't get me started. (I mean it this time , mainly because I'm straying so far into Idle Banter territory I'm making myself sick.)

g.

"Origami".

"Whelk".

"Badger on a stick".

CraigGrannell wrote:"Origami". "Whelk". "Badger on a stick".

Right then... Do you know how they get those sticks up the badgers? I'll tell you: with a hammer. A bloody great sledgehammer, a couple of hefty whacks, and there you have it: a meaty snack for a family of four.

And do you know why whelks are called whelks? Because that's the sound they make when you stand on them.

And as for origami... don't get me -- hang on, I've used that joke twice already.

g.

In _my_ version, the badgers just cling on to the sticks. Much more PG.

(As in Parental Guidance, not Paul Glancey. I doubt Paul hangs on to sticks on a regular basis.)

According to the Zzap! Bible Ultima V - Warriors of the Destiny wasn't reviewed (if I used that correctly).

Anyone know why?

Because the badger stole it.

Or Paul Glancey ate it.

More probably _GH_ ate it.

Or Paul Glancey spilt tea all over it.

Or Maff froze it.

Or... OK OK I'll stop that.

Voon,

You know how pointless stuff sticks in your head? well I've been waiting 16 years to mention this...

Mountie Micks Death Ride. By Arialosoft.

16 years for this thread to materialise.

I've never forgotten its name because it sounds so cool. I always imagined a lantern jawed guy riding a cable car up a snow capped mountain and wondered what kind of game that would make.

According to Julian Rignall it was never reviewed by Zzap.

Do I win a prize?

Do I win a prize?

Yup, two bananas up yer ears!



(Oh dear, it's so difficult trying to be funny in a language that isn't yours )

ANyway...

Rob

biggestjim wrote:(Oh dear, it's so difficult trying to be funny in a language that isn't yours

How true; after all, "two bananas up your nose" would have been positively hilarious. Well, unless you're one of the bananas.

Iain wrote:<snip> Makes you wonder about GM stuff doesn't it...

Funnily enough the whole affair is being used to push GM through to 'save' the banana.. at least that's my understanding, but I agree with your point, it backwardly highlights even more the potential consequences of meddling with our food supply.

However, that being said, to head back to topic I note that these didn't get reviewed:

Staff Of Karnath - Ultimate
Space Doubt - CRL
Automania - Mikro-Gen
Pyjamarama - Mikro-Gen

Most of those were pre-Zzap! but maybe rereleased? I don't know what the deal with Space Doubt was though as that was released in '86 I think, I'm not sure it would have scored high though.